Monday, December 7, 2009

Ad Mats Rise From Nostalgia's Grave

The ad mat tells us that The Capitol Cinema "shattered world records with two great action movies, WHERE EAGLES DARE and THE DIRTY DOZEN.

"Now," it continues, "comes the most sensational, action-packed thriller of them all."

Well...no. The most striking difference between Clay Pigeon ('71) and Where Eagles Dare/The Dirty Dozen is that Clay Pigeon is totally terrible and the other pics are arguably two of the greatest war/action pics ever made.

Even the occasional slice of nudity could not save this mess.

It shattered no records, either.

One of Australia's best filmmakers, John Duigan, wrote and directed this gritty classic about homeless youth.

Duigan also directed the magnificent Lawn Dogs, Flirting, The Year My Voice Broke, and Romero.

I snuck into the city (downtown Melbourne) to see this movie because I knew it'd be something special. It bowled me over with its realism and unsentimental truth (and stellar lead performance by Kim Krejus).

Sadly, it's not available on DVD. A VHS was released.

Very mediocre Richard Fleischer film featuring an indifferent Michael Caine in the lead.

Slavery as entertainment has been well served in the cinema with works such as Farewell, Uncle Tom and Mandingo. In Ashanti, the subject is a dead one, and not even a diverse cast could rescue it from oblivion.

Should have seen this '77 trash classic at a drive-in because it's perfect drive-in candy. Since I wasn't old enough to drive or own a car at the time of its release, impersonating an 18-year-old by showing up at The Palace in a suit and lowering my voice several octaves was my only course of action.

The film is a celebration of being young, dumb, and full of cum. It didn't depict a lifestyle most Australians enjoyed, but its anarchic spirit was universal.

Director Sam Grossman's only other film was the 2000 sci-fi flick Static.

Wasn't a big fan of this, but always loved the ad mat.

At the bottom of the ad, the co-features are listed. I would have headed to the long-defunct Moorabbin or Frankston Drive-ins to see it with the far superior Who Slew Auntie Roo.

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